Mother DNA

When nothing seems interesting and each day seems a total failure; living a lifeless life; when everybody seem so untrue and egoistic; when I feel I have nothing to share or in other words not willing to share my life; when I feel the shallowness in my eyes; when I feel I can’t control myself for unreal temptations; when I feel I m lost; when I feel egoistic; when I feel possessive; when I feel the unquenchable desires burning my life; when I m still adding to the ego of the ‘ I ‘ each day; and when I feel so cold blooded, spiritless and soulless about the this life; I ask myself, “ where are you getting strength to pull yourselves up and believe that you can be on top of your life?”

On the other hand I m not all that bad. I m a little artistic. I  seem to enjoy light moments. I enjoy the sun the moon the water the green the birds the heat the cold the morning the night the dusk the dawn the noise the silence the roads the mountains the music the walk the sleep the food the companionship the aloneness the work the books and the good part of everything. Yet while enjoying, a big part of myself seem missing the moment and keeps wandering elsewhere because these things don’t make me feel my-self or rather I can even say this isn't the special me which motivates life, that is to live one more day.

I would be just another bummer of this generation. I would be so weak. Easily moved. Shallow. Pathetic. Mean. Narcissistic. Just blood and bones. May be I m but there is something in me that deeply hates me for all these. There is something in me that is a rebel against the evil and just won’t give up. There is something in me that cry when someone else is hurt. There is something in me that make me feel someone else’s pain. There is something in me that makes me extend my hand to help someone first. There is something in me that make me give up something dear just to see someone else smile. There is something in me that make me feel so embarrassed when I waste someone else’s time. There is something in me that make me move towards the center of myself. I have been looking at my mom from childhood and all these something is just a fraction of her goodness. I realized I would have been a cold blooded beast if I hadn't had her DNA in my blood. May be each living thing is unique in this world and existence and I m unique in my own way but I, now realize the special part in me, that keeps me moving. If at all I still stand to live one more day after each day I lose to the devil inside me, it is this God; this DNA of my mom which runs through my blood gives me strength and makes me move ahead. May be my life has been meaningless and may continue this way for days to come. But the fire, the burning truth of my life will add a meaning at some point eventually. I whole heartedly believe I can’t be here without the love of my dad.

Live every moment.

Love

Karthik Vasan B

Eye of the Heart

I see people walk by and give me a fake smile when they look at me..

I hear people giving false praise just to get something done from me..

I see people talk just because they can..

I have people trying to be in touch with me just in case..

I have people hating to live what they are but living like they don’t have a choice..

I know people who take what they want irrespective of anything whatsoever..

I have people serving everyone they meet and badly disappointed by what they get in return..

My old people still believe that we are puppets of the God..

My young generation feels they are ruined by the past..

Someone is happy getting an expensive dress..

Someone is happy hurting someone else..

I know people who ill treats others just because they feel they are superior..

I know people trying hard to live a better life..

I know people who feel they are heroes..

I know people counting their life in terms of money they earned..

I know men who abuses women..

I know people who feel very bad about their lives and feels so let down on every step of it..

I see people looking for a change and keep waiting for it..

I have seen people die out in vain..

I know people who feels they know everything..

I know and know the other kind of people who do just the opposite of these people..

I know I have known nothing..

I know more about myself and yet do nothing..

When the unknown is so much and is almost everything, How shallow are we trying to own things..

Why are our eye veins convey signals to the shallow mind and not to the heart..

Why are we gone weaker than the mind..

Why is the mind using us and made us addictive and not the other way..

What is that forcing us against the will of the heart..

Why we fail to see through the eye of the heart..

Why we do things when we still know its wrong..

What makes things right and wrong..

There are always been these two polarities of life and the extremes always hurt..

Why cant we be just at the center of it..

The best answer I know is drop the whys..

But I keep wandering between the extremes unable to settle myself..

I m still at the beach waiting for the ocean to absorb me into it..

Shallow are the eyes..

See beyond and don’t see nothing.

Love

Karthik Vasan B

Queen of the far afield

a travel to the uncertain, a palace of the queen..

in almost five years.

neither me nor the queen were anticipating.

it was like from never could be to possibly be..

i was lost elsewhere in a journey of everything.

i din't know if i was at the right path when the path i took was no more.

now at the cross road, i m least bothered about the direction or the destination.

i used to have dreams of flying high and falling from space.

at the end of it this time, i woke up in a palace rather than my bed and it was afternoon.

for a moment i thought it was a day dream.

the wind was drifting in just one direction, the direction of the heart.

the  life was repeating itself infront of my eyes.

a mother was here to care too.

a sister was here to see me through.

suddenly lights everywhere..

a path highlighted to walk and run..

life proves itself to be large yet again..

this queen is the queen of hearts..

the language in this part of the world is only of the heart.

words are only of the silence.

enfranchised is this world..

a palace in the wild.

and there is so much peace in this wild that the devils of the heart are already dead here.

the queen has started hunting in the deep forrests now.

the intuition she provides with her verve is a gift.

she knows she is finding her own energy back in this quest..

its been a carnival staying here in this palace.

a travel to the far afield..

there are very few moments when you are at total peace in this unconscious journey..

its when you know you are at the right place..

its not gonna matter when i wake up after this dream back on my bed..

i know i wont have that hard feeling under my throat unable to swallow..

and forever the happiness of this journey of  the heart will follow..

bless the queen.

every moment is beautiful.

this moment is beautiful.

love

karthik vasan b

D King

few people just have the power..

the vibration they possess flows around them..

you can see from their eyes even which they would have hardly noticed..

they keep moving here and there always wanting to do something..

they hardly seem to notice why but it had never mattered when they are engaged.

they have the ability to control their thoughts and streamline them..

to convert their view into action.

the essence in them ,

their reckless approach,

patience perseverance everything is so divine.

and at the same time very pitiable.

i m lucky to have such people around me right from my birth; to be specific starting with my mom.

D King is one such guy whom i know now for not more than a year.

He is one guy who will make you say what d F*** a thousand times if you spend a day with him.. if u just spend it... but it will be a day lived when you open your eyes and heart and see the reality. all he does is out of clear conscience, innocence. he has been around me when i'm down and you could see the climate changing around you.. i have suddenly forgotten my sorrows and would start to feel like I'm in another world.

he passes the positivity, a flow of current, and it makes you glow..

he possess the capacity to bring the sun out of the dawn into your day..

i would have been much worse if he had not been there around at the time he was and i call it the right time..

be it coincidence or another angel.. words are  inappropriate  to express a relationship when its time to bid adieu physically.

people like them are gems of this mankind and should be properly taken care of. they most of the time turn out to be the most stressed people trying to live among this freaked out world. i just wish the don't lose their energy allowing negativity to flow through them.

a friendship doesn't need a criteria and you wont even know when it had blossomed when you are in the company of such people. 

Hail D King.

bless

live every moment.

Karthik Vasan B

Castles in the Air

A heart so big

A mind so small.

In a life so short

Light-years it may take to reach

And I hope and hope to reach.

                       

I walk and walk in the path so dark

I fall and rise from the pits that came in as a shock

Light-years it may take to reach

And I hope and hope to reach.

Hardly have I remembered the lustrous star

Lost in the unpromising subsistence

Light-years it may take to reach

And I hope and hope to reach.

The more I perceive

The gloomier it gets.

Light-years it may take to reach

And I hope and hope to reach.

To perceive is to suffer so it be

The hope of hope is with me.

 Light-years it may take to reach

And I hope and hope to reach.

Soul Steel

Law of conservation of energy states that energy can neither be created nor be destroyed. It changes from one form to another in terms of what we intend to do it. Sometimes my instincts say that even things we have categorized as non living things which possess some internal energy, also does have a soul in it.

        The cosmic evolution states that the universe is homogeneous meaning it is uniform everywhere. The state of being is same at any point in any huge level you can think of. But we humans have taken us in a direction where we are trying to differentiate ourselves in very microscopic level as possible even culturally. I really wonder whether we are living here or its just a fantasy of the thought process created by the reaction of the gases in and outside the body we live in and I also wonder how with such micro thoughts, the concept of god is introduced in our system which is the whole. Lets leave this here cos this isn’t what I intended to share. So basically though not all that seriously, I find non living things lively. When they possess an internal energy, they also possess a soul.

        I, a metallurgist, am in love with the steel I make each day. A new born baby is thoughtless, mindless and a source of high energy level. he is said to have very high level of consciousness can be considered as God which is very much in harmony with the cosmos. Biologically a body is dead or alive depending on whether there is circulation of oxygen in the body. the circulation of oxygen in a newly born baby projects him in the purest form of being, the so called god. What he become later on depends on the ambiance he grows in. his thought process; he being good or bad everything depends on it. And so is my steel. I’m a primary steel maker which means I’m as good as a pregnant woman giving birth to a child. A steel is steel when I create an ambiance where it comes to life. I don’t know if some dead animal has started to walk again but everyday, at work, I see a dead metal come to life in my furnace. It comes to life in an atmosphere  of pure oxygen. As a matter of fact, there is more oxygen in the furnace for the steel to live than for me to breathe in the control room where there is a high carbon monoxide level of 200ppm. Just like a pregnant woman losing her breath when she delivers a baby isn’t it. :)

        Life, either inside me of in the steel I make depends on whether we breathe oxygen. And the sheer pleasure to see the birth of life, a vibrant fresh and pure form of energy being evolved, is incomparable. I see god everyday.

        Many say it is a curse to be working in a steel plant. Yes, the working atmosphere in the shop floor has taken its toll on my health. But I don’t know why I’m here.. but I tell you one thing for sure.. I find great joy making my steel; to create life in a metal.. to see a soul in steel.. to see God in that fraction of a  moment.. makes me realize that the cosmos is homogeneous whatever or however our thought process changes.. life is the same either inside you or a metal. in our day to day life its understandable that we don't see life in a metal but it will be not wise to see fellow living beings in the same way. respect all. remember, you are nothing when there is no oxygen left in you. 

 my steel.. Soul steel..

        This is dedicated to all those who loathe me that I’m here.. to all those who loathe me as a steel maker..

Love you all.

Live every moment.

Karthik vasan b.